It seems likes it’s been forever since I’ve blogged. I guess 9 weeks is a pretty long time to step away from anything, but I’ve had good reasons. In my absence a lot has transpired, most importantly, the birth of my beautiful daughter. That has been the high that has carried me through.
I don’t want to dwell on the negative because I have so much to be thankful for right now, but the fact of the matter is, not everything has been rainbows and sunshine. About two weeks ago, I was fired from my job, a job that I loved, working with people that I loved, while I was still on maternity leave.
Was it right? No. Was it fair? No.
I haven’t openly talked about the situation with anyone except my family. They are who I trust in times of trial, who I lean on for support, and while they’ve been great and supportive, I’m still having a hard time moving past the situation. It just sucks.
It sucks because I wasn’t really given a good reason why I was being fired. It sucks because I was told that because I’m a new mom, they didn’t think I could handle the stress and responsibility of the job anymore. It sucks because I had to walk out of the office, dry my tears and put on a brave face for my husband because he’s been carrying the financial burden of our family for 8 weeks now.
There’s no worse feeling in the world than feeling powerless. I couldn’t stop what happened. I can’t change it. All I can do is keep holding my head high, moving forward, and praying that everything will be alright.
I’d like to sit here and say with confidence that I know everything will be alright. Part of me knows it, but the other part of me is scared and doubtful, angry and hurt.
My daughter is swinging in her swing right now, drifting in and out of sleep. She smiles every now and then and it makes me smile. She’s the light in this dark situation. She’s the silver lining.